William's birth story

I write this mostly for my own record.  I've become a much better blogger than I have journal writer... I guess this blog has kind of become my journal, minus the very personal thoughts I have.  I don't feel like my birth experience with William is overly personal, I've already shared it with many people, therefore I'm writing the overly detailed account here.  Continue at your own risk :)

With all of my pregnancies, I have had very distinct labor contractions.  I knew I was in labor right when the first contraction started.  I had 3 or 4 months of braxton hicks contractions with all but the first, where my uterus would contract and my belly would become as hard as a rock.  I would have those maybe 5-20 times a day.  They're uncomfortable but certainly not painful.  My labor contractions have always been accompanied by "pain" (some would tell you to call it "pressure"), starting out feeling like a menstrual cramp and getting progressively harder.

I woke up early Wednesday morning having felt what I thought was a labor contraction.  Of course this got me very excited... interesting how during those last couple weeks of pregnancy you're just waiting, almost hoping, to feel that first painful contraction that will signal that the end is near.  So I of course couldn't sleep and got out of bed waiting to feel the next contraction.  With the other pregnancies, once I felt that first labor contraction they didn't stop.  The contractions with Joe were a little more irregular at the beginning, but eventually become 10 minutes apart, then 7, then 5 and so on.  Very predictable.  So I was extremely disappointed when, after an hour, I felt no other contraction.  Back to bed I went, and through the next day I plugged along, wondering when this baby was going to come.  If he was going to ever come.  I was still 6 days away from my due date, but for some reason that seemed an eternity away.  With Joe being 5 weeks early, I never expected to make it this far.

The next early morning brought the same thing.  I woke up at 3 am having felt a labor contraction.  I was a little skeptical this time around, so laid back in bed.  Just as I was about to fall back asleep another one hit, about 30 minutes after the last.  I still stayed in bed, and lo and behold, another contraction came 30 minutes after that one.  I've never had contractions that far apart, but I was sure this must be the beginnings of labor.  They continued every 20 or 30 minutes, and I finally told Pete the good news when he woke up at 6 am.  Both of us had been getting a little anxious for this little guy to come, but I think Pete was even more excited and anxious than me!  For him, having the baby meant 4 days off of one of his busiest and least favorite months of work yet.  And for me, it meant actually seeing Pete, having him home for dinner and having his help with the other kids.  Oh yeah, and it meant welcoming this sweet little guy into our family :)  So we were both thrilled at the thought of this being it.  But when the next contraction didn't come for an hour and a half, we were both a little down.  Was this labor or wasn't it?!  I thought this was probably it but that it might be a really long day with the contractions starting so far apart.  Pete had lectures that morning so decided to go to those, keeping his pager and phone near at all times.  And I encouraged him to go.  I didn't want him missing one of his 4 precious days of paternity leave if this baby wasn't going to come for a while... that night?  The next day?  I had no idea.

So we continued our day as usual.  I just happened to have an appointment with my midwife that morning and was hopeful that she might be able to help me decide what was going on and what I should do, if anything.  I had had some spotting that morning as well, which was also unusual for me.  But I ended up seeing a student midwife, and she wasn't much help (no offense).  She simply said if the contractions become about 5 minutes apart then head to the hospital (thank you, but I already knew that).  And if your water breaks then get to the hospital fast, because with pregnancies other than your first, things tend to happen pretty quickly after the water breaks.  She said she didn't think they'd be seeing me next week (I sure hoped not!)

So off to the park we went, where I was meeting a friend.  The contractions were still coming about every hour or so.  I walked through one of them, but the other 2 I had to stop what I was doing and assume my squatting position... my position of choice during harder contractions.  By the time we left the park I had had a contraction just 10 minutes after the last.  Still not too painful though.  Pete called just after I dropped John off at school.  His lectures were over and he was wondering if he should come home or go up to work.  I told him the contractions still weren't too bad... maybe just go to work?  And then I had a contraction 5 minutes after the last while I was on the phone with him... so I told him it might be best to come home.

I parked the car in our garage and as soon as I got out started having another contraction.  And then I felt it.  My water broke.  Fluid didn't come gushing out, but I knew it had broke.  After what the midwife had told me that morning, I immediately called Pete, who was half way home by now, and told him to hurry (Does that really make a person get home faster?  It probably just stressed him out... oh well.)  And then the contractions started coming rapid fire, 2-3 minutes apart, sometimes less.  I was dilated to a 7 with Daniel before I had an epidural, so I knew what hard contractions felt like, but these took it to the next level.  My squatting position no longer did it.  I had to get down on all fours, close my eyes and rock back and forth.  I was getting anxious for Pete to get home, at least have some knowledgeable adult there with me.  Dan and Joe thankfully weren't really paying any attention to me.  I quickly called around trying to set up babysitting for the kids in between contractions.  My visiting teacher could come over but was checking out at the grocery store and wouldn't be there for about 20 minutes.  And my friend could pick up the kids when John got home from school.

As soon as Pete walked in the door I told him we needed to leave as soon as possible.  He watched me through a couple contractions and could sense the urgency so ran over to see if a neighbor was home.  Lucky for us she was and was willing to stay with the kids until the next person got there.  Then Pete threw our bags in the car (later he showed me he had grabbed some hand sanitizer and floss... just in case he had to deliver the baby in the car!... little did we know how close it was going to be.)  I just have to say, as soon as Pete was with me, I didn't fear anything.  I didn't fear having the baby at home, didn't fear having the baby in the car, didn't fear giving birth to this baby without any pain medication or epidural.  I felt like I could do anything with Pete by my side... sounds cheesy, but it's true.  He'll confirm the fact that I didn't want him, or anyone else for that matter, touching me during contractions or really anytime in between, but I did still need him there.

When I got in the car, face sweating and hands clammy, I knew at once this was going to be an awful drive.  I've always wanted to give birth naturally, and at the beginning of this pregnancy was determined to make this one the one.  I decided to go with a midwife, read several natural birth stories, researched different methods to relieve pain, different positions to try, water baths, hot showers, birthing balls, massage... I had a whole list of things I was going to try before giving in to an epidural.  When I got in the car I had to put all those ideas aside and use the one thing I had.  My lungs.  Turned around in the front seat up on my knees, I started wailing softly through the contractions.  I quickly found the louder I wailed the more it helped.  Or the more it took my mind off the pain (I'm sorry, I was trying so hard to think of it as pressure... but it was pain).  Pete was such a sweet husband, trying to sound calm and relaxed and telling me to remove myself from the pain and take it just one contraction at a time.  His words actually did help.  The quick turns, accelerations, and sudden stops did not :)  Not his fault.  He had a pregnant lady in the car, possibly minutes away from delivering their baby.

By the time we made it to the hospital, about 20 minutes away from our home, my moaning had turned into yelling and finally screaming.  When we were still a few blocks away I told Pete that I wanted an epidural right when we got there, if that was an option.  But as soon as we pulled up, my body started pushing.  That's when the screaming began.  Not screaming because I was scared, screaming to deal with the pain.  I always thought I would be the silent type if I made it that far in labor, closing my eyes and handling the pain within.  Not so.  I opened my eyes enough to look out the window to find some very concerned faces on people standing around.  Funny how I didn't care one bit.  Pete later told me he thought I might be delivering right there on the curb.  Thankfully that didn't turn out to be the case.  A security woman saw what was happening and quickly wheeled a chair over to me.  I had to make it through one more contraction before I crawled out and resumed my kneeling position atop the wheelchair.  Then they ran me upstairs to triage, with me yelling and screaming and moaning the entire way.

Up on the maternity floor, I was wheeled into the closest room available.  Not even a delivery room, just a room with a bed.  I waited for one more contraction to pass, then took off my pants, crawled onto the table, screamed through a few more pushes and out our little William came!  About 7 or 8 minutes after arriving at the hospital and less than an hour after my water broke.  Looking back, it's all kind of a blur.  But to be honest, I don't think I would change one thing.  I have told Pete many times, honestly the only way I think I could give birth naturally is if my labor was so short that an epidural wasn't an option.  I guess I got my wish.

William Hirschi Jackson was born at 1:04 pm on March 22, 2012.  Weighed in at 7 lbs. 15 oz., our biggest baby yet!  A healthy, strong baby arriving here safely is all we ever prayed for and that's what we got.  We feel extremely blessed to welcome this new baby boy into our family.